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The Grinch Who Stole Halloween

Adapted by Steve Chavez a.k.a. Wraith

Everyone in Boo-ville liked Halloween a lot…
But the Grinch, who wrote for a newspaper, did NOT!

The Grinch hated Halloween! The whole Halloween season!
Now, please don’t ask why. No one quite knows the reason.
It could be his childhood just didn’t go right.
It could be his neighbor’s candy generosity was too tight.
But I think that the most likely reason of all,
May have been that his Halloween spirit was two sizes too small.

But, whatever the reason, his spirit or neighborly abuse,
He stood there the night before Halloween Eve, hating the Boos,
Staring down from his office window with a sour, Grinchy frown,
At the warm lighted pumpkins below in their town.
For he knew every Boo down in Boo-ville below,
Were finishing costumes, getting ready to go.

“And they’re gathering their candy bags!” he snarled with a sneer,
“Tomorrow night is Halloween! It’s practically here!”
Then he growled, with his Grinch fingers nervously drumming,
“I MUST find some way to stop Halloween from coming!”
For, tomorrow, he knew…

…All the Boo girls and boys would arrive home very early.
They’d rush for their costumes! And then! Oh, the fun!
Oh, the fun! FUN! FUN! FUN!
That’s one thing he hated!
Then the Boos, young and old, would go trick or treat.
And they’d trick! And they’d treat! And they’d go TRICK OR TREAT!

They would feast on Boo-candy, and Boo-popcorn balls.
Which was something the Grinch couldn’t stand much at all!
And THEN they’d do something he hated all sorts!
Every Boo down in Boo-ville, the tall and the shorts,
Would sit close together, with Halloween music in back.
They’d sit side by side. And the Boos would start to snack!

They’d snack! And they’d snack!
And the more the Grinch thought of this Boo-Halloween-thing,
The more the Grinch thought, “I can stop this whole thing!”
“Why, for too many years I’ve put up with it now!”
“I MUST stop Halloween from coming!

…But HOW?”
Then he got an idea! An awful idea!

“I know just what to do!” The Grinch laughed in his throat.
And he sat at his desktop and wrote and he wrote.
And he chuckled, and clucked, “What a great Grinchy trick!”
“By using the fear of others, I’ll stop them real slick!”

“All I need is a scapegoat…” The Grinch looked around.
But, since scapegoats are scarce, there were none to be found.
Did that stop the old Grinch…? No! The Grinch simply said,
“If I can’t find a scapegoat, I’ll make one instead!”

So he grabbed up his newspaper. Then he looked at its story,
And decided to say that Halloween this year was too gory.
THEN he loaded on bias and propaganda in stacks
On a ramshackle premise and called them “true facts.”

Then the Grinch said, “To Press!” And the story started down,
Toward the homes where the Boos all relaxed in their town.

All their windows were lit. Quiet sounds filled the air.
All the Boos were inside getting ready with care.
When he came to the first little house on the square.
“This is stop number one,” the old Grinch reporter hissed
And he walked to the front porch, newspaper in his fist.

Then he knocked on the front door, with nary a flinch.
If Girl Scouts could do it, then so could the Grinch.
He waited for an answer for a moment or two.
Then he stuck his head into the house and said “Hello Boos!
What’s with all these pumpkins and Halloween objects?
Don’t you know Halloween is showing disrespect?”

Then he slithered and slunk, with a smile most unpleasant,
Around the whole room, watching all that were present.
Momma and Poppa, brother and sister!
Grandma and Grandpa, even Aunt Flister!
And he laid out the paper with his story on the floor,
And he left them to read while he made for the door.

Then he slunk to the icebox and he drank while they read.
And he made himself a sandwich with their Halloween bread!
He cleaned out that icebox as sure as you’re born.
Why, that Grinch even took their last piece of candy corn!

Then he walked to the pumpkins with obvious glee.
“And NOW!” grinned the Grinch, “Halloween belongs to me!”
And the Grinch grabbed up those gourds with no loss of love,
When he heard a small sound like the coo of a dove.
He turned around fast, and he saw a small Boo!
Little Cindy-Lou Boo, who was not more than two.

The Grinch had been caught by this tiny Boo daughter
Who’d got up from reading for a cup of cold water.
She stared at the Grinch and said, “Mister Reporter, why,
“Why are you taking Halloween from us? WHY?”
But, you know, that old Grinch was so smart and so slick
He thought up a lie, and he thought one up quick!
“Why, my sweet little tot,” the old reporter said,
“It’s so wrong to celebrate when others are dead.”
“So your parents should live in fear of what’s yet to come.”
“And send back this Halloween to whence it is from!”

And his fib confused the child so he patted her head.
And he got her a drink and said “Because” instead.
And when Cindy-Lou Boo went back with her cup,
HE went to the pumpkins and blew them all up!

Then the last thing he took was the hanging ghost they’d acquired!
Then he walked out the door, himself, the old liar.
On their walls he left nothing but hooks and some wire.

And the one speck of truth that he left in the house
Was a grain much too small, even too small for a mouse.

Then he did the same thing to the other Boo’s houses
Leaving truth much too small for the other Boo’s mouses!

It was almost The Evening…the Boos in their houses,
The Boos seemed to be reading and talking with their spouses,
And the Grinch took Halloween stuff and made for town’s edge.
The Costumes! The Ghosties! The Pumpkins from the ledge!

Three thousand feet up! Up his own office tower,
He rode with his load to the tiptop to glower!
“Pooh-Pooh to the Boos!” he was Grinch-ish-ly humming.
“I’ve convinced them now to stop Halloween from coming!”
“They’re just waking up from their newspaper trances!”
“Their mouths will hang open in horrified stances.
Then the Boos down in Boo-ville will all cry Boo-Hoo!”

“That’s a noise,” grinned the Grinch “That I simply MUST hear!”
So he paused. And the Grinch put a hand to his ear.
And he did hear a sound rising through the night air.
It started in low. Then it started to grow…

But the sound wasn’t sad! Why, this sound sounded merry!
It couldn’t be so! But it WAS merry! VERY!

He stared down at Boo-ville! The Grinch popped his eyes!
Then he shook! What he saw was a shocking surprise!

Every Boo down in Boo-ville, the tall and the small,
Were all trick or treating and having a ball!

He HADN’T stopped Halloween from coming! IT CAME!
Somehow or other, it came just the same!

And the Grinch, with his grinch-jaw quite slack,
Stood puzzling and puzzling: “How could it be back?”
“They saw past my words! Ignored all its fright!”
“I’m still hearing fun loving screams in the night!”
And he puzzled three hours, till his puzzler was sore.
Then the Grinch thought of something he hadn’t before!
“Maybe Halloween,” he thought, “doesn’t come from a store.”
“Maybe Halloween…perhaps…means a little bit more!”

And what happened then…? Well…in Boo-ville they write,
That the Grinch’s Halloween spirit grew three sizes that night!

And the minute his spirit didn’t feel quite so tight,
He whizzed with his load through the Hallows Eve moonlight.
And called out his love for Halloween reborn!
And he…
The Grinch reporter handed out the candy corn!

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